Natural negotiation is where you get what you want, but in the knowledge that the other person is happy with the outcome. Whether you never see them again, or you want a long-term respectful relationship, successful negotiation aims to balance our own needs with a genuine wish for the other person to be content and satisfied also.
What the difference is
Most negotiation models assume that someone will have to compromise. They start by setting out the different aims of those involved. This highlights the distance between the parties and the extent to which they are in opposition. In contrast, our approach focuses for as long as necessary on the process of creating dialogue, without pre-judging the outcomes. This brings the parties together, and allows goals to form from common ground. Solutions then emerge quickly and easily, and are likely to be stable and longer-lasting.
Shift rather than compromise
When we allow space for the process of dialogue, trust builds and the issues become clearer. As they gain a fuller perspective on the whole situation, people shift their stance naturally. In place of compromise, a previously ‘either-or’ situation changes to ‘both-and’, in which neither party has given up or given in. Shifts are never imposed. They arise organically from real and increasing understanding by the parties concerned. Nobody feels they have lost out: everyone has ownership of the outcome.
How this works
What people ‘want’ is actually a strategy for meeting needs at a deeper level. When we tune into people’s needs, we connect meaningfully with their concerns and engage in mutually beneficial dialogue. In this type of negotiation, mutual trust and genuine respect increase and everyone involved feels included and consulted.
When and where to negotiate
Everyone needs negotiation and we all do it, all the time. From crucial business decisions to everyday chit-chat, we are continually negotiating with those around us. With increasing awareness of our own needs, the needs of the situation / organisation and of others concerned, negotiation becomes creative and rewarding, and effective.
We also offer a course or coaching which introduces you to the principles and practice of negotiation, and helps you to improve your skills in negotiation. See: Learn Negotiation.
Contact us to arrange negotiation between workplace colleagues, individuals, team-members, or private individuals. Free! We offer the first consultation for organisations free of charge.