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Communication Blog (questions, tips, support)


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We answer our reader’s questions, give support and offer mini-tips–all on the subject of human interaction. If you want to sign up for a free monthly email, click here!


1 November 2014 - Tip 14: How to face something grim

In my Mindful Ice Bucket video, I talked about how to welcome life's experience, however cold or wet it makes you. Then, the very next day, I came down with acute appendicitis. Now this...

1 October 2014 - Q32: Want to change the world? (What are you doing this Thursday?)

This Thursday, October 2nd, marks the world's seventh International Day of Non-Violence. So here's an idea:Perhaps you've already taken the Ice Bucket Challenge- but if not, don't...

1 September 2014 - Tip 13: How to carry on the holiday at work!

September 2014My clever chiropractor brother says interesting things about relaxing your back when it's tight or tired - and I thought, "Well, what about tight or tired conversations?" So...

1 August 2014 - Tip 12: Useless communication – and why it’s a good thing!

This week, a journalist writing in The Guardian newspaper questioned the Labour leader's 'politics of empathy', saying that it means nothing without effective policies. "I don't want a dentist...

1 July 2014 - Q31: What can Marie Antoinette teach us about communication?

According to the popular story of Marie Antoinette, the Parisian mob was thronging at the palace gates demanding bread when the French queen appeared in the royal balcony and, with a wave of her...

1 June 2014 - Q30: Can politicians speak mindfully?

This May, I had the privilege of attending the launch of a new All-Party Parliamentary Group on mindfulness.[1] Here I was, invited into the Houses of Parliament simply because I meditate! For many...

1 May 2014 - Q29: What can great art teach us about listening?

I spent my Easter bank holiday gazing at the sea paintings of Turner, at Greenwich Maritime Museum. Apart from my love of Turner's seas and skies, I wanted to learn more about listening...

1 April 2014 - Q28: Why do I go blank – just when something matters?

Pausing is what our systems do because they're alive to a complicated set of circumstances that we call 'now'. It's what happens when we find our normally intelligible words and sentences...

1 March 2014 - Q27: How can my body help me to communicate?

One reader sent me a question about my January tip, Q25: Do you want to conquer your fears this year? It was about limiting beliefs, the views and assumptions which stop us doing what we...

1 February 2014 - Q26: A reluctant Valentine ... Are there ‘bad reasons’ for saying ‘yes’?

Many years ago, I had a friend who made out that February scared him, because according to an old tradition, Valentine's Day was the one day in the year when a woman could ask a man to marry...

1 January 2014 - Q25: Do you want to conquer your fears this year?

Would you like to fly higher this year? What stops you may be your own inner barriers - your doubts, fears and limiting beliefs. Yet, in the words of a world champion hurdler:'If we doubted our fears...

1 December 2013 - Q24: How can you stay merry this Christmas? - Terms and Conditions!

Does your festive season run off love, merriment and fun - or do guilt and anger get in the way? Ideal conditionsHere's a useful question for this time of year:What are your ideal conditions...

1 November 2013 - Q23: Is it wise to say how you feel?

As some of you will know, Peter often talks of 'scary honesty'.  As I see so many people appreciating his sessions, I've asked Peter to give us his own take on how it helps to show our...

1 October 2013 - Q22: How can I say, "You've got bad breath?"

Yes, someone actually asked me - because her new romance depended on saying it well. When we have 'negative' feedback, however constructive, we may feel understandably wary of giving...

1 September 2013 - Q21: How do you cope with change? (Gmail users, that's you!)

Important note for Gmail users: If you're one of the estimated 150-300 million Gmail users, did you know that Google is making global changes that may affect you? There's a new in-box system...

1 August 2013 - Q20: Who's running your conversations?

I've just returned from Dhanakosa, a beautiful retreat centre in wonderfully sunny Scotland. We were leading a retreat with the theme, 'Who's Living your Life?' It made me wonder about communication:...

1 July 2013 - Tip 11: How to stop bickering

In our close relationships we deal with so many humdrum questions - who will empty the bins, why we're out of cat food, whether to turn left or right - it's easy to slip into bickering. How can we...

1 June 2013 - Q19: How would you approach someone who doesn't want to hear what you're trying to say?

Following last month's post on 'how to criticise your boss', one reader wrote to ask what to do if our boss just refuses to listen. Since this could happen with anyone, let's start there - and then...

1 May 2013 - Q18: How can I criticise my boss?

Offering feedback is often tricky. How much more so, when it is directed 'upwards', to somebody above us in a hierarchy. How can we ensure our feedback is respectful and appreciated? Is there a way...

1 April 2013 - Q17: Why can't I let go of my feelings?

"Be positive!"... "Just let go!"... "Laugh it off!"... We so often hear this advice. But what if we try – and we end up feeling worse?  Undoable adviceHave you ever noticed that...

1 March 2013 - Q16: How can laughter resolve conflicts?

Laughter is famously good for us. A peek at Google reveals over 10.5 million sites which refer to its health benefits. And I've just discovered that laughter doesn't have to be 'real'. Even fake...

1 February 2013 - Q 15: "Love, love me do!" What can we learn from a love song?

How we can ask for things in such a way that others are happy to respond? In a month overflowing with pink love hearts, I take my inspiration from a love song ...I love you! might be exactly what you...

1 January 2013 - TIP 10: ... And a joyful new year!

Wishing all my readers a joyful new year!I'm sure many others have already wished you a joyful new year - so here's a short tip about making the most of our joy! But in case 'joy' is not a word you...

1 December 2012 - TIP 9: Listening - The perfect gift!

Why is listening the perfect gift?How do we feel if we're fully heard and understood? Relieved, perhaps! But much more too. When somebody really listens to us, we feel it viscerally; we sigh...

1 November 2012 - TIP 8: "What? Christmas in the shops already?" - How grumbling can change the world

Every year, around November, I have the same grumble: "Christmas displays so soon?" ... "Christmas carols already?" A small grumble maybe, and harmless enough. But when it's about other people, the...




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